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God’s Wisdom When You’re Single
When it comes to dating, our instincts – even if you’re a Christian – are often influenced more by Love Island and The Bachelorette than anything Jesus ever said. Jesus gave two foundational principles to navigate all of life and they provide a roadmap for approaching areas, like dating, that hadn’t even been developed when He walked the earth.
We often assume that somebody that pretty or that successful couldn’t be lonely. It’s like we assume loneliness is the penalty that you get for not measuring up in the game of life. Not only is that not true, but it adds the weight of condemnation to the pain of loneliness itself. Loneliness affects just about everyone at different points in their life, but it comes in different forms. Consider the 4 voices of loneliness and how you can answer them.
As marriage rates drop and singleness rises, Christians face new challenges in dating and contentment. This post explores the insights of a 7,000-person survey and offers biblical encouragement to those navigating singleness and God’s plan for their future.
On Sunday we looked at some of the gender implications of Genesis 2:18, the verse that says, “Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” But there were many questions that time did not permit me to answer. Some people assume that the verse is a call to marriage. And Genesis surely does recommend marriage. But Jesus was never married. Did Jesus miss reading Genesis 2:18? Did He believe that “it’s not good for man to be alone?” Was Jesus “not good” in some way because He was single? The answer to those questions sheds important light on what this verse does and doesn’t teach.
The church has often been accused of being all about families and not about singles. I think the criticism is well taken. “Focus on the Family” is not only the name of an organization but it could also be used to describe many churches. I remember a Japanese pastor seeking my advice as to whether a single man he was mentoring could be considered for the ministry even though he wasn’t married. I responded with a strong “Yes,” but instead of just pointing to Jesus and the apostle Paul as justification, I pointed to the growing number of single adults in our society and the unique challenges they face. In the early 2000’s, adult single people outnumbered married people for the first time in Canada. And the temptations are greater than ever. That’s why I was glad to see the article by Tyler Velin entitled “Don’t Waste Your Singleness.” While the title sounds a little preachy, the principles he highlights are important.
